Come on, admit it, at some point you, too, have crushed on a movie character. Am I right? Sitting there in the theater, eating your overpriced popcorn, you've nearly fallen out of your seat because suddenly there appears the most gorgeous, adorable, perfect character you've ever seen. Right there in front of you. Thirty feet tall. Tall and beautiful.
And alas, they're not real.
And that hurts.
Thank goodness for DVD players and the ability to watch those movies over and over again. And in the darkness of your own living room, you can close your eyes... and pretend....
Here are my top ten movie crushes, in no particular order...
1. Louis Connelly, August Rush
If you can, in fact, remove your jaw from the floor after witnessing any scene which involves Jonathan Rhys Meyers, you perhaps can then take the time to appreciate how absolutely adorable his character is. Louis is a musician who meets The One. When he loses her through circumstances beyond his control, he crashes. But when he decides he's going to go out and find her, hope -- and music -- comes back into his life, and he takes up his guitar again. And damn, he is good. Pros: A nice guy, a great musician, very passionate. Cons: Has some inner demons he needs to purge.
2. Clark Kent, Superman Returns
Some people think Lois Lane is kind of a moron. Supposedly this is because she can not tell that Clark Kent is Superman, even though she has spent ample time with both of them. But really, I think the main reason she is moronic because she is WITH ANOTHER GUY. I mean sure, James Marsden's cute and all, but how can she ignore Brandon Routh's smoldering eyes? How can she not see how completely beautiful a person he is? Why is she still with James Marsden even, I don't know, ten seconds after Clark Kent's come back to Metropolis? Really, Lois -- we need to have a talk. Pros: Kind to children and animals. Cons: Is kind of awkward and dweeby... OR IS HE?
3. Gilbert Blythe, Anne Of Green Gables and Anne Of Green Gables: The Sequel
There is something to be said for a guy who truly loves just one girl, even when she gives him no hope whatsoever. A guy who offers this girl rides to and from work. Who offers a switcharoo so that she can have his job, because it's closer to her home. And who stands by while she gets her act together, waiting as patiently as he can. In some places, he'd be called a stalker. But viewers know Gilbert Blythe's heart is true, and FOR HEAVEN'S SAKE, ANNE, GET A CLUE! (Whoa, did that just rhyme? Go me!) Pros: Sweet, patient, smart. Cons: He does like to tease...
4. Mike Nelson, Mystery Science Theater 3000: The Movie
Oh, Mike, Mike, Mike. Mike's stuck on a spaceship called the Satellite of Love. He lives with four robots. They're forced to watch terrible, gut-wrenchingly awful movies, and yet -- he and his pals find humor in all of them. Their riffs -- everything from obscure pop culture references to simply making fun of the stupidity on screen directly -- consistently leave me in stitches. Pros: Mike is extremely witty and is patient with his robot friends, even though they give him a hard time. Cons: He's sort of stuck... up in space. Not much hope for a "life", really...
5. Benny Rodriguez,
The Sandlot
I know, I know, the kid's like 13 years old and I should not be crushing on him at my age. But considering I was about that age when I first saw the film, and considering the actor is, in fact, older than I am in real life, I see no wrongdoing. So leave me alone, dangit! Meanwhile, Benny is the most adorable member of the Sandlot squad. He's the best at baseball, the fastest runner, and he's super sweet. While the other Sandlot kids are cracking rude jokes about the new kid, Benny reaches out and invites him to play ball. Pros: Total sweetheart, the only one brave enough to truly face "The Beast." Cons: Has some personal fears he must overcome. But hey, who doesn't?
6. Johnny Martin, Penelope
In this film, a twist on the "Beauty and the Beast" story, Johnny falls in love with Penelope, despite her fantastical disfigurement. He sees her for her true beauty. Now he's just got to get her to see that! Pros: He's super sweet, and plays musical instruments like a pro. Cons: He has some personal problems early on in the film, but he eventually cleans himself up. Yay for reformation!
7. Indiana Jones, the first three Indiana Jones films
Brilliant, brave, and badass -- let's face it, Indiana Jones is the epitome of cool. Pros: Good-looking, resourceful, can handle just about anything. Cons: Except snakes.
8. Oliver Wood, Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone
It'd be one thing if Oliver Wood was just a good-looking Quidditch player... but no. They had to go and cast a gorgeous Scottish actor (Sean Biggerstaff) in the role of the Gryffindor Quidditch captain. Whenever Oliver goes about explaining the wizarding game to little Harry Potter, I tend to lose all sense of time and space. Pros: The accent, omg the accent. Cons: In the books, Oliver's kind of crazy. But wait, who said anything about the books? This list is about movie characters! Forget that then -- Oliver is awesome.
9. Robin Hood, Disney's Robin Hood
I am not ashamed to admit I think an animated fox is kinda sexy. Robin Hood is clever and brave and has an English accent, oh my. Pros: He's a one-woman man, dutifully devoted to his childhood love, Maid Marion. He would even die for her, which is totally romantic. Cons: He's a little cocky, but at least he can back it up. Have you seen him with a bow & arrow?
10. Mr. Darcy, Pride and Prejudice (1995)
So he's prideful. And prejudiced. But only at first! Elizabeth Bennet manages to warm & soften his heart like a yummy Tollhouse cookie. Pros: Mr. Darcy is nice to his little sister, mean to anyone who'd try to hurt the women in his life, and looks great after a midday swim. Cons: Always with the staring, the longing staring. We're not Edward Cullen, here, Darcy! And it's not polite to stare! Oh, but it's okay... you're adorable, I forgive you!
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Well, looks like I couldn't stop at just 10! Here are
four more movie characters I've got a crush on.
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I hope you enjoyed this list, and maybe even agreed with me on a few of them. If not, tell me about your movie crushes. And if you're currently in a relationship now and couldn't possibly admit to having any current crushes -- tell me who you liked when you were a kid. Was it Han Solo? Marty McFly? Charles Foster Kane? (Hey, I don't know how old you are!) Leave some comments and let me know!