30 Days Of Retro Toys 2016 - Day 11 - Glamorous Barbie Furniture

Day 11:

Glamorous Barbie Furniture

(Sears catalog, 1964)

Midge would love them, too. In fact, after discovering a red hair on her pillow a few weeks ago, Barbie has begun to suspect Midge has somehow obtained a spare key to the dream house and is secretly squatting there by day.

30 Days Of Retro Toys 2016 - Day 10 - Barbie and Her Friends (1964)

Day 10:

Barbie and Her Friends (1964)

(Sears Catalog, 1964)

Fashion Queen Barbie: "Feast your eyes upon my holiday wrapping paper bathing suit with matching Egyptian headdress!"

Midge: "Huh? Sorry, I'm too busy looking at your $1.97 counterpart over there. WHAT is on HER head?"

Ken: "I knowww! I can't stop looking at it. Does anyone else hear a buzzing sound?"

Beehive Barbie: "What, you mean THIS little ol' 'do? The one I put together in 5 easy minutes? You like it, you say?"

Ken: "No. And I'm confused. Which of you is the real Barbie, my girl friend?"

Fashion Queen Barbie: "Fools! I am the real Barbie! I am the most expensive of all of you!"

Midge: "Ugh, you're such a snob. Just because you're the headliner and I'm just your less-mature-looking friend...."

Fashion Queen Barbie: "You can say that once more. Your lame attempt at looking sexy has failed. Your bathing suit pieces don't even match!"

Ken: "Ow, something stung me!"

Beehive Barbie: *bzzzzz*

30 Days Of Retro Toys 2016 - Day 9 - Sears Parking Garage

Day 9:

Sears Parking Garage

(Sears catalog, 1964)

Can someone please explain to me the appeal of toy parking garages? Google is telling me something like 200 different versions exist, which seems a bit strange. Oh well, here's a groovy vintage one with one heck of a ramp, and here's a wikipedia page all about (real) parking garages! Enjoy.

30 Days of Retro Toys 2016 - Day 8 - Nintendo 64

Day 8:

Nintendo 64

(Nintendo Power, 2000)

I'm a little confused by the words "at last," there, as video games were by no means new things in the year 2000.

But heck yeah Paper Mario!!

30 Days Of Retro Toys 2016 - Day 7 - Aluminum Play Structures

Day 7:

Aluminum Playground Structures

(Magazine ad, 1959)

Today, aluminum play structures. Tomorrow: THE MOON!

30 Days Of Retro Toys 2016 - Day 6 - Little Tikes Kitchens

Day 6:

Little Tikes Kitchens

(Sesame Street magazine, 1987)

It's almost sad to think that these plastic things replaced those amazing corrugated fiberboard kitchens.

30 Days Of Retro Toys 2016 - Day 5 - Frosty Sno-Man Sno-Cone Maker

Day 5:

Frosty Sno-Man Sno-Cone Maker

(Sears Catalog, 1964)

Years before Snoopy got in on the sno-cone act, an oddly-shaped sno(w)man poured forth frozen sludge from his belly, making it possible for young children to partake in a tasty treat on a hot summer's day.

Haha, a Snowman Sno-cone maker! So retro. So--

UGH.

30 Days Of Retro Toys 2016 - Day 4 - DuckTales NES Game

Day 4:

DuckTales NES Game

(321 Contact magazine, 1991)

You bet your sweet little tail feathers I'm "duck" enough!

30 Days Of Retro Toys 2016 - Day 3 - Gym With Climber Swingset

Day 3:

Gym With Climber Swingset

(Sears Catalog, 1974)

Remember how the legs of those metal swingsets would start to pop out of the ground when even one good-sized kid would go for a swing? 

I'm morbidly interested to see how "eleven youngsters" would fare.

30 Days Of Retro Toys 2016 - Day 2 - Jumpin' Jiminy Inflatable Trampoline

Day 2:
Jumpin' Jiminy Inflatable Trampoline

(Sears Toy Catalog, 1964)

Not to be used as a flotation device? HA! We laugh in the face of such warnings. PUT THIS RIGHT IN THE OCEAN, KIDS!

30 Days Of Retro Toys 2016 - Day 1 - LEGO

I had a lot of fun gathering vintage toy ads and posting them for 30 Days Of Retro Toys last year. So I'm going to do it again this year! Starting today, I'll be posting 30 glorious, nostalgia- and/or cringe-inducing toy ads from 1953 to 2000. Enjoy!

Day 1:
LEGO

(Sesame Street Magazine ad, 1987)

I ended last years' list with a 1964 LEGO ad, so I figured I'd start this year's with a LEGO ad from 23 years later!

Once upon a time, other plastic block companies used to brag about their products' useful storage buckets, which LEGO did not have. In 1987, LEGO finally said, "Hey, we can do buckets, too!"

And so it was that kids were now able to create giant plastic amalgamations of LEGO, Duplo, and some kind of gravity-defying stabilizer (because I have serious doubts that the kid's boat would hold together like that, but now I kind of want to build one and find out.)

We had the magical buckets, but I'll be darned if we ever actually put our LEGO pieces away in them.